March 2011
A theory
timbolopolis:
Humans aren’t actually mammals. A mammal moves to an ecosystem and adapts. Humans do not. They move to an area, use up every natural resorce and multiply. There is one other organism that follows this pattern: a disease.
Me: Can I use the bathroom? Teacher: I don't know,...
jennnnloves:
TEACHER:
OTHER STUDENTS IN THE CLASS:
AND I’M JUST LIKE :
If I was the teacher, I’d respond with: “the key to true control of prose is clarity and brevity. Your original choice of wording was not clear, and your smartass comment was a waste of my time. So, for now, no. You cannot go to the bathroom. Also, say please next time” Ya burnt.
Sir, if you'd just quiet down, I'd be happy to...
Me: I got another double down today. WHAT IS MY LIFE?
Keenan: Eh, you gotta be addicted to something. I’d invest in a mumu though.
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“They only eat two meals a day - emergency crackers and vegetable juice for...”
– Fukushima 50’s Poor Working Conditions: Dry Biscuits, One Blanket
Everybody cease complaining this instant.
(via clembastow)
Never quitting my job, ever.
YOU IDIOTS
YOU CAN GO TO KFC TODAY AND ORDER THE DOUBLE DOWN. TOMORROW IS THE MENU RELEASE BUT IT’S ALREADY IN THEIR SYSTEM.
GO FORTH AND GET FUCKING FAT.
How to save yourself the $145 to see "Spiderman:...
dcwomenkickingass:
1. Queue favorite U2 Song on iPod
2. Watch this
Now that it's over...
For a short period between mid 2010 and last Friday, all of the following roles were filled by women:
My local mayor
My state Premier
My state Governor
My Prime Minister
My Governor-General
The head of my monarchy (i.e. the Queen)
The head of state of my nation of birth (Brazil)
That’s surely some sort of awesome record, no?
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faely asked: Do you think I could get my hands on one of those newspapers tomorrow?
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mariposima:
Aw, man.. please don’t reblog my personal childhood photos and remove all text and links from them like they are some random photo on the internet.. :(
Tumblr needs a reblog disable button..
This, forever.
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bodkins answered your question:Planning on having a Liberal-themed party now that they’re in power here in NSW
you sassy wench (that is not a suggestion)
That could have been a suggestion, though!
Planning on having a Liberal-themed party now that...
Suggested games:
Pin the tail on the approved community-diminishing high-rise
Non-musical chairs (we cut the arts budget)
Pass the blame parcel (to the opposition)
Charades of a functioning government
Heads in the sand, thumbs up
(Pandering to) Dead soldiers
Any others?
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I'm off to bed early for the first time EVER. →
This is a significant event so leave me something to ponder on when I wake up.
tinacohen-loser:
today I ran into albert at uni and I helped him and his friends pass a unit.
I also made Chap lose at Glee trivia by not attending.
I’m like the Dave Grohl of UWS.
reading some of the bloggers inane SXSW posts...
tombsstone:
suicidewatch:
A band can not be a lo-fi band. Their record can be lo-fi but when they are playing that music live it is in no way lo-fi. These terms no longer have clear meaning. Man, I really love Elvis’ lofi shit for Sun Records. Fuck you, die.
THIS. “lo-fi”. Stop it people.
Honestly reading most SXSW blog posts has made me reconsider going next year. Just seems like a huge...
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Jason Chatfield: I need to catch a cab. →
ellieck:
flaviia:
jasonchatfield:
I woke up this morning in Emergency at the Alfred Hospital. The right side of my head throbbing, not able to open my jaw, my drawing arm shredded up from my shoulder to my wrist and my hips shooting pain up my spine as I tried to move my legs- and I’m told the first thing I was saying was “Shit,…
Shit is scary, bro! I was leaving work (at Crown) at this...
